Boom, Bang and Sparkle

Where we grew up, fireworks were illegal. Sparklers and smoke bombs were about the only things you could get. Later, things that sparkled but didn’t go boom became available. There were years we’d drive south and start seeing signs for fireworks for sale in places where it was legal. Once or twice, Dad would stop and we’d buy what we could afford with our limited budgets.

In my state, most fireworks are totally legal. Like weeds in the garden, firework store fronts pop up in almost every strip mall starting in June. Towards the end, they start with the “buy 1 get 5 free promotions” – probably because the leases run out right after the fourth of July and who wants inventory. (Although it might be cool to just let it all blow up in a spectacular display).

Our city has rules and regulations on when you are legally allowed to light stuff off. On the 4th, you have until midnight. With the lack of big community shows, we had several neighbors doing their own celebrating.

Fireworks and dogs don’t mix. Rocco is generally not bothered by thunder but the booms set him on edge. He really didn’t calm down until we went to bed and he was in closed room with us and with the lights off. The neighbor’s show went on for a bit longer but he still managed to fall asleep.

As much as missed our normal 4th activities, I didn’t miss the crowds. I don’t know if it is the aftermath of being home bound for so long, but I’m really in no hurry to go subject myself to being around large groups of people. I mean we no have options that we didn’t have but it doesn’t appeal to me. Every time I think about trying to go somewhere, another voice in my head talks me out of it.

I would like a little more human contact – not going to lie about that. But I want it to be smaller. Lunch with a few friends. Chatting with my dance friend at group class. Things like that. Some of that is available but, again, I just find myself not really wanting to take advantage of it. I’ve gotten more nervous about restaurants so I really don’t yet have an interest in returning to that life. If we lived in an area where you had nice outdoor seating options, that’d be a possibility but, most of the places that have outdoor seating just give you views of a parking lot and, really, who needs that.

It just seems weird but home feels more “safe” than it ever has before. Which brings all these mixed emotions – wanting to get out and get back into life but then feeling the call of home warning me to stay inside. I mean we do go out and get Rocco some exercise and I’ve started dance lessons again but that’ really about it.

I don’t feel overly concerned or worried about the ‘rona – at least round here it hasn’t staged a massive comeback. Maybe it is just seeing all the people in masks that just feels “wrong”. Makes it seem like unseen dangers lurk everywhere.

On the plus side, I’ve done a heck of a lot of reading. Still nothing more relaxing than sitting outside in the shade with a good book. Kind of lets me forget the world around me and get lost in the world I’m reading about. Which is probably what I’m going to go do right now. Guess I’m just writing this as a way of finding some connection to the outside world that I’m just not ready to fully jump back into.