Well not quite yet but you just take things a day at a time. The first interactions with people were better than I expected. It felt good to talk about a few things and I managed to do it without breaking down. Got lots of hugs Tuesday night at the studio.
The hardest part was the card from people at work. For some reason, when I read expressions of sympathy and support it just triggers this massive rush of emotions (and some tears if I’m going to be honest). So I told people I couldn’t read the card until I went home. Then, there was an additional surprise inside. They had collected some money and made a donation in Mom’s name to the humane society in her home town that she supported. There were two people at the studio who did the same. None of these people actually knew Mom but they did it anyway which really touched me.
Got back into dancing this week. Monday night at Studio B, Mindy added some choreography to the hustle. Some of it I knew from the Famous Franchise so it went quicker than she was expecting. We didn’t get to dance it to music which is still the real test but we walked through the steps several times. I suspect I’m going to need to do it again next week because I didn’t write anything down and it has already sort of left my mind. We touched briefly on the Swango and we get the coach for another 30 minutes next Monday to add some more pieces.
Tuesday night, Kid T decided to take it easy on me which was a good thing. Monday was actually a work holiday so my first day back at work was on Tuesday and that was kind of a long day so I was a little worn out. We just touched on four dances that are fun (Mambo, West Coast Swing, Fox Trot and Peabody). She made a few minor tweaks/suggestions but it was more just dance and have fun.
Tonight, we started back into it picking up the Rumba where OwnerGuy left off. It really felt flat and off the first couple of times we were doing it and I was kind of getting a little down on the whole thing. But it was only because we were just slowly getting back into it. Once she saw that I had the footwork down, Kid T brought up the connection and that was what was missing. A lot of moves were like the coiled spring I’ve mentioned before. The opening outs just work better if you get some compression and then she can kind of bounce off me into the step.
There were parts of the Rumba where I started to get in my head a bit about the whole Cuban motion thing. Actually, it is more about what kind of dance the Rumba is and how I find the right character. I’ve just discovered that is important to me. Each dance has a particular feel and I can kind of slip into different characters to match each dance. Rumba is kind of the romantic dance and I’m just not really thinking of myself as the romantic male lead. So I just get in my head thinking about how I look trying to be something I’m not feeling and you know how that goes. I managed to actually convey this thought to Kid T and I think she actually got it so we are not only working on Rumba steps but on some way for me to get an attachment to the dance. Right now, it just doesn’t speak to me and that makes it hard for me to really enjoy doing it.
Want to swing back just a bit because someone made a comment on my Facebook that got me thinking. It was someone I knew from dance a long time ago and they remarked something about how I got my love of dance from Mom. I hadn’t really thought about that before because, outside of my older brother’s weeding, I’ve not really seen Mom on a dance floor. But, I remember several conversations where she talked about how much she enjoyed Swing dancing both before college and during college until she started dating my father who hated dancing.
I do believe that dancing is both a natural and learned skill. And that I’ve come to believe that I do have a certain amount of natural ability that had to come from somewhere. But I never really connected the dots. Maybe this is a gift that I got from her.