Careful what you Wish For

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So there’s a wall at the Fitness Center at work where they highlight an employee and have them talk about what fitness means to them.  Kind of a way to publicize their program and to speak to success stories.  Since I’ve been a steady client for a couple of years, I always wondered what you had to do to get noticed.  I figured it was more likely that they wanted to feature people who come to all the exercise class.  Me, I prefer to sweat in private (except on the dance floor).

Then, today, I get an email from my trainer telling me that they’d like to feature me as a success story and gave me a couple of questions to answer which would be posted at the fitness center for two weeks in November.

Cue the INFP anxiety.  Like I’ve wanted this recognition and validation and then, when presented the opportunity, my first thought was to run screaming.  No, not me!  Go find someone else! I don’t want my story out there for everyone at work to see.  Noooooooooooooooooooo.

Then, the second part of the internal debate kicked in.  I mean I’ve read the other little stories and they are either all about people overcoming some major obstacle or getting in shape to do some kind of major event like some marathon somewhere.  I’m doing this for ballroom dancing?  What kind of reception is that going to get?  Maybe it is just hard to get over some of these gender things that I didn’t think I really had.  Somehow, I just perceive that certain guys are not going to see dancing as “manly”.  Which is stupid because I’ve gotten nothing but positive comments when people find out.

On the other hand, dance is a sport – just with nicer clothes.  Has the strength training helped me be a better dancer?  Absolutely.  So many of the dance moves come from the core but they look like they come from the arms and you need the strong core to make those happen.  Plus, as the guy, my job in a lot of cases is to just be solid and something for the lady to work off of.  The more centered and balanced you are, the easier it is for her to do her things and I believe the more that she trusts that you’ll be there, the more she can commit to certain things.  I do think that in both studios that as I’ve increased strength, it has lead to my instructors being willing to try different and flashier moves because they have more confidence that I can support them when I need to.

So why not say all that?  Being a good dancer is important to me.  (Maybe too important but that’s a topic for another day).  If this helps that and also makes me feel good in the process, then why not share that with the world.  I mean I know everyone needs to walk their own path but if anyone asked (and they have), I would highly recommend working with these trainers.  They know what they are doing.  With one exception, I’ve had nothing but positive experiences.  They are supportive but know when to push you.  And they have such a variety of options that things are never boring.  So all I’d be doing is saying the types of things I’d say if someone asked.  But should I really be doing that since nobody actually asked.

In the end, I decided to go ahead and tell my story.  Well, I had to start the message over three times before I could find the right words but I did it.  Now I’m just wondering if that was really the right thing to do.  Kind of like the scene in Office Space where the guy slips the envelope under the door confessing to having stolen the money and then has second thoughts and tries to reach under the door to get his letter back.  Trust me, if you’ve seen the scene, you’d understand.

Now, I just worried they are going to ask for a photograph.  I hate having my picture taken so I avoid it at all costs.

One comment

  1. It IS important that you share that ,with people. It could give some other guy the courage to take the ballroom dance class in spite of the ideas of gender roles society imposes on us. It helps break down stereotypes. It’s also beautiful that you’re sharing your passion with the world

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