(Note: I suddenly feel like writing even though I’m in between lessons so you’ll have to indulge me while I get this out. It is going to be heavily Star Trek TNG themed, so, if your not a fan, it might not make much sense)
I was a big fan of Star Trek TNG although I actually liked Deep Space Nine a little better. I found Voyager to be too preachy and a waste of good characters. No, I haven’t watched any of the “reboots” and I don’t plan to. That is just a sign of lack of creativity from Hollywood and I really don’t need to see how someone else envisions these characters. But that’s just me.
And, I’ve come to the inescapable conclusion that if I were transported into the TNG world and made a bridge officer, I would be Deanna freakin Troi. Now, this is not a post where I try to type the various characters using Myers-Briggs because others are better than that so I’m not saying that she is the same type. What I’m saying is that of all the bridge officers, I’m closest to her.
Now, if you were a guy watching TNG, this is not a fun thing to have to admit. Her character was among the most annoying on the show. Of course, nobody could top Wesley Crusher who was just a total waste of space but they wrote him out early enough so he wasn’t around to annoy me for the entire run of the series. The doctor who replaced Doctor Crusher for one season wasn’t that good either. She had an abrasive personality and didn’t seem to gel with the rest of the cast. But Deanna was there for the entire run and was annoying from start to finish.
How did I arrive at this, you ask? Well, you may not have asked but I’m going to tell you anyway.
This is in some kind of order of who I’m least like.
And that list starts with the Klingon Worf. Klingons are warriors and I couldn’t even kill a bug that hitched a ride home on me the other night. Also, there were several occasions where his thinking was a little too black and white for me. I see way too many shades of grey and see 17 sides to most issues. Yeah, I’d make a terrible chief of security and weapons officer. I can see it now. “Lock phasers” “But they really seem friendly to me” “SHUT UP AND LOCK PHASERS”
And we can quickly eliminate Dr Beverly Crusher. Way too much school work to be a medical doctor. Although, in that century, you really just had to wave a wand over someone and it seemed to fix all their problems. I never wanted to be a doctor so that would be out as well.
Oh, and Lt Commander Data gets eliminated as well. Data was smarter than all the rest and was superior in many ways and yet all he really wanted was to feel some emotions. I suppose when he got the chip in one of the movies then maybe I could see myself there but I’m not going to count that. I’ve certainly got my fair share of emotions. Well, I probably have his share as well. If I had been there, maybe I could have just transfused some of mine to him and problem solved. No, I used to think I was more of an android but that is clearly not the case. So, scratch Data from the list.
Commander William Riker is the next to go. I think I would make a good second in command if I could stay on the sidelines and advise the captain. More of a chief of staff really. But that wasn’t Riker’s style. He was the party guy with the cards and the jazz and all the other stuff that could be fun for a bit but I would not need to spend all my off time socializing with the crew I had just been working with. Besides, he’s a little too alpha for me to pull off. The beard and all and that’s just not a look I can compete with. I probably wouldn’t like that much if I was on the bridge crew and given the Troi/Riker story arc on the actual show, that could be a problem. (Well, ignoring the fact that I’m male and Troi was female which TNG at that time wasn’t ready for)
Then we come to Geordi LaForge. This guy was famous for pulling the Enterprise out of whatever situation it had been caught up in. It was always a similar theme. All of the regular stuff isn’t working. Suddenly, Geordi says “wait a minute, if we (insert realistically sounding technobabble) then it might work”. It was like the greatest solution in the world that nobody else had ever thought of. He should have had hundreds of Nobel Prizes or whatever the equivalent would have been in that universe. I can relate to the creative problem solving part because I do have the ability to think of strange connections that people haven’t seen before. But, I can tell he spend many hours with technical manuals learning the ins and outs of the engine and there is no way I could devote that much time to learning something that deeply. I’m more of the surface, get the gist kind of guy.
And now we come to Captain Jean-Luc Picard. He might not belong this high on the list except my job as a manager type kind of forces me into making decisions. Of course, I hate making a lot of decisions because I can see 17 sides to each issue. Or I just don’t really care about certain things so whatever someone does is fine with me. But, too many people need reassurance and need to follow chain of command so I spend a lot of my day fielding questions and making decisions. You don’t see Picard agonizing over his decision later which I don’t really do that much but I do it often enough because I hate making snap decisions. Plus, let’s be honest, I’m not really into structure that much and the rank system in TNG requires a little more deference to people who don’t really deserve it. (That would be an interesting thought – to look at how many admirals and above were really awful people in the Star Trek world. Better to stay as a captain)
And that just leaves Counselor Deanna Troi and her annoying half Betazoid empathic abilities.
Then, I look at my day from today:
- One of my crew comes in to talk about medical issues and things her father is facing and what our policy is on taking time off. I can see she’s on the edge and so I end up telling her there is a policy but we can make something work if she needs to go.
- I’ve got another one who is a contractor who is looking for a permanent position elsewhere and she asks to talk to me about her phone interview tomorrow. She’s really nervous about it so I’m trying to come up with intelligent things to say to help her prepare and give her some advice.
- Then, I’m meeting with another person and we get done talking about her project and I know there is something else on her mind. So I just prompt a little bit until she talks about some rumor she’s heard about what might happen so I try to figure out what to say to offer some reassurance.
And this is not all that unusual. I guess everyone just needs someone to listen every now and then and sometimes tell them that everything is going to be OK or to give them a little advice on how to deal with something.
Just like Counselor Deanna Troi. Still not exactly the best thing for a guy since most guys would probably rather be Worf or LaForge or Riker. But, that’s really not me.
Or, I could be like another TV show: “This is D Wall and I’m listening”. Sorry, but I’ve warned you before that all my pop culture reference are seriously dated.
OK, that’s all for now. I can’t promise what the next post will be. I’m just kind of in a mood where ideas are just flying be me. I’ll just grab the next one and run with it.