Awkward Thank You’s and Positivity

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(Tonight is just a mixed bag of topics with a little dancing thrown in)

I got a hair cut last week.  Haircuts are not fun experiences for me.  It is the whole introvert/awkward small talk thing that gets to me.  If I’m lucky, I get a chatty stylist who likes to talk about her life and I can just listen and interject when needed.  Sometimes, I get the ones who try to start conversations but they usually end up asking a dead end question like “do you have any kids” and I say No and things just die.  Sometimes, it is just silence which would seem to be best but it is the most awkward because my mind is going “say something” but nothing ever comes.  Normally, I don’t mind the silence but something about being in that situation makes me not want to be the silent customer who never talks.  But the whole starting of a conversation is difficult due to my lack of small talk skills.  Sometimes, you get the stylist who just carries on a conversation with the others in the studio and you just have to sit there.  Like, sorry I’m so boring that I’m not even worth talking to.  Mostly, I just want it to be over.  Which is why I typically wait 2-3 weeks past the point when it starts bothering me to get it cut.

Then, I start getting the compliments from various people.  “You got a haircut”.  “Yes, I did.”  “It looks nice.”  “Oh, thanks.”

Now, I’m really wondering what I’m thanking them for.  I didn’t do the job.  Sure, I gave her some vague parameters to work with like how much to take off, but it was her effort.  So why I am taking credit by thanking them for the compliment.  If I was truly clever, I might come up with some snarky comment but maybe that isn’t really a place for snark and sarcasm.  After all, someone is being nice and giving them sarcasm back isn’t really the right thing.  But it just feels strange to me to be thanking them for noticing something that I didn’t do.  It would be like seeing a nice painting and talking about how nice it is and having the canvas thank you for it.  Well, that’s kind of silly since the canvas can’t really talk but it’s the best I’ve got.

I do sometimes wonder where is the outer ring of the circle of people that you know when compliments must mean that person is super observant (or is silently watching you at every opportunity).  People at work or at the studio are in the inner circle of people I react with often enough that it presents no problems.  The baristas at my night time coffee place?  OK, maybe some of them make sense.  I have been going there for years and I’ve managed to have less awkward conversations from time to time.  But the ones who I don’t see that often because they are typically in the back making drinks.   Is my face that memorable that you noticed I got a hair cut and had to say something about it?

Today, I was working with TrainerGuy2.  Actually, since I called the original one TrainerGuy, I was debating whether I should call these other two TrainerGuy1 and TrainerGuy2 or TrainerGuy2 and TrainerGuy3.  (Yes, I think about these things).  In the end, I’ve opted to stick with TrainerGuy like he’s the hotel lobby which doesn’t count as a floor and we’ll go with TrainerGuy1 and TrainerGuy2.

TrainerGuy2 is a somewhat loud extrovert who loves to talk.  Fortunately for me, I like to listen.  I’m not really sure how much of it is an act because he just says a lot of really silly stuff but I’m comfortable working with him so that’s good.  Well, today, he tells me that I must be in the top 1% of all people who work out.  He says think about all the people who don’t go to the gym or those who just come and mess around.  I know he’s just pulling this out of his backside but it was an interesting comment.  He’s very big on the positive reinforcement and I know that’s what he’s doing but he’s good at it so, even though I’m no bodybuilder, I still walk out of there laughing.  Which just hides how sore I am in certain places.

OK, just a few short comments about dance.  I told Kid T that I wasn’t impressed with the opening of the Argentine Tango so I suggested we just start walking towards each other and then maybe circle around each other and then get into frame and just go right into the first move.  Might be a little cliche for Tango but it felt better than just standing there and holding a couple of beats and then doing a few poses before starting.  Well, she adapted my idea and we made it work to the music and actually did the whole thing right through the two new steps she added.

I did also stay for the party last night and stayed through the end which isn’t something I’ve done in a bit.  There was a shortage of men so I was in high demand.  I suppose I should really give social dancing a little more credit.  I’m spoiled with Pro/Am because I get to work with a pro and do all these fancy moves and when it works, it is great.  But social dancing can still be a lot of fun and you can just feel the happiness and enjoyment in the room.  I think I needed that little bit of fun because it did allow me to push a lot of the negative stuff to the side for a bit.  Well, that’s enough for now.

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