Since we spent a lot of time on technique last week, my instructor thought it would be a good idea to work it into the Tango routine and see what happens so that’s what we did last night. Lots of details which is a good thing but so much to remember. Going into promenade requires rotating my shoulders and hips but not my head. On certain steps, remembers to keep our chests aligned. This always involves an Iron Man comment because someone said to think of Iron Man and pretend like you both have lights in your center like he does and keep them aligned. Kind of silly but reinforces the point. Most of that is about finding the right amount of rotation which is difficult as I do tend to under rotate certain things and over rotate others – which makes it more difficult to fix. But the key is keeping the frame solid. She finally pointed out last night that when I get “lost”, then I tend to freeze up and relax my frame which just makes things fall apart. That’s a product of my over-thinking which would be nice to get rid of. We have fixed amalgamations which is supposed to help because if I know what steps I’m doing, then that should be one less thing to think about but the transitions don’t come as quickly as I’d like and I’m also too used to moving in a certain direction so if an obstacle is there, then it takes me too long to figure out where to go next. Bottom line is that I want the movements to come more naturally but I don’t know how to get there.
She’s mentioned a couple of times that she’s trying to let me lead a little more which means she is not thinking about where to go and just reacting to what I do. That sometimes leads to rather spectacular failures like last night where I somehow had her doing backwards swivels and that totally confused her- she couldn’t figure out how I was able to do that. And, I had no idea either and I couldn’t duplicate it. I know the steps but I don’t know them well enough to just do them automatically so something else takes over from time to time; I guess a muscle memory from something else just shows up and messes things up. I am trying not to get overly deflated about this because this was just one dance and each one has their own issues. I know nothing can be perfect (although that is certainly what I’d like) but there is so much to remember and it is so easy to mess up that it does get a little depressing at times. The challenge though is to continue to push those thoughts out of my head because I know the negative attitude doesn’t help. Because I also know that when I get down on myself, she has a tendency to ease up which might make me feel better but it keeps me from working on things I need to work on to improve. The good news is she mixes in a little more positive feedback so I at least have a sense of what I’ve done well and what still needs work.
She does take her shots at me from time to time based on some of the freak out lessons in the past. For now, I’m taking each one as motivation to avoid getting to that place in my head again. But we take that one lesson at a time.